♥Tuesday, May 17, 2005♥
Ok...Time to get emotional.' Dun Put In 100%Can someone gimme a weighing scaleor any gadget that allows me to see how much I've put into? Or can someone teach me how to divide my love into portions so I can inputor withdraw from time to time??To me, if I din put in 100%, how the other party will contribute 100% to me? It's like a mirror reflection mah.. If u expect ppl to treat u good, u ought to do the same, isn't it?Or let's put it tis way.. Today i feel tat i dun really love u, I put 50%, but if 2molo i "song" or I feel tat i love u more, I put in another 20%..Doesn't make sense rite??? Simi dai zi leh??'This was copied from Wendy's blog...*Sorry huh,buddy...borrow this from you*I find this very true...But what if i am the one who love 100% and the other loves me 50?What will happen to me?Ok...i am thinking too much again...*wake up!!!*After my chat with Mark,I been thinking...For the truth.This is the second time,i ever dare to really 'love 'someone until i willing to forsake for love...The first time was ,Kiong...and now was Mark.For 22 years ,i dated so many times,so many guys...Only 2 times i really loves devotedly...Kiong was a big mistake.Mark is still a hope...."Don't make love so complicated,Love is actually very simple"Mark told me this...I am confused.Is love really that simple?Then why it took me so long to finally dare to love?Why loves hurts so much when it's just that simple?I kept telling myself that i won't be bothered about what Mark's friends comments were... when they knew that we are backed together.Lots of my exs' friends won't really liked me...cause i am a control freak!!!And i didn't really treated them the way i should.I admit.I broke lots of hearts.I am a very pampered girl.Doted me with Gifts and loves that i needed.You name it,I have it.But i still not happy...I still felt empty.Some people do learn from from their mistakes.
And changes takes time.
Where else,some people will just never learn.
Till now Mark came into picture.He had been a romeo and an ass hole to me.Now i am hoping he becomes my knight in amour saving me from my emptyness,I do hope he would be my....*shy*Hope this would be my last stop.I will definately give in my best shot.I pray for him to do the same....I better stop here before i think too much again.Nites...
ends at 4:56 AM
with love ♥
Koji's blog
